Tinder Takeover

January 19, 2017

“If you can’t handle me at my DND, you don’t deserve me at my DTF.” Dungeon Master J

Is it good clean fun, or your worst nightmare? See what happens when our host, Jane Marie, takes over the Tinder accounts of two different women—for better or for worse.

Spark a new conversation with DTR—a branded podcast from Tinder, produced in partnership with Gimlet Creative.

 

 

 

TRANSCRIPT: 

Jenna: GUYS! I got a match, I got a match, I got a match. Sorry, that was so loud.

 

[THEME IN]

It sounds like I just got a Furby on Christmas and I’m 8.

 

JANE: Hey, I’m Jane Marie, and this is DTR — a branded podcast from Tinder and Gimlet Creative about defining the relationship in the digital age.

 

Defining the relationship can get a little explicit, so if you’re listening with kids, you might want to press pause or put your headphones in for the rest of this episode.  

 

Because this episode is about MARRIED PEOPLE ON TINDER.

 

[THEME OUT]

JANE: No, not married people using Tinder to date. But, you know how your coupled-up friends are always like, ‘give me your phone, I want to swipe for you.’ Partnered people LOVE swiping, because they either miss it a lot OR they’ve never experienced it and want to give it a try.

 

I’m not married, I have a boyfriend and I love commandeering people’s phones and playing with their Tinder. I love playing the digital yenta. So, for this episode of DTR, we’re going to play matchmaker for two lucky ladies.  We’re taking their phones and doing what WE think is best for these babes.

And by “we” I mean, me and my friend Andrew Ti.

ANDREW: Hi! I’m Andrew I do a podcast called “Yo, Is This Racist,” I’m a writer and I’m the foil, the dating foil to Jane. I think all my instincts are exactly opposite of Jane.

JANE: Oh Yeah.

ANDREW: Yeah. So we’re a perfect balance.

JANE: First of all in our ten years of friendship…I have met exactly one and a half people that Andrew has dated.

ANDREW: I don’t date a lot.

JANE: Right, and I date everybody.

ANDREW: Oh snap.

JANE: That’s a joke, but instincts wise…. Like, when we say you have different instincts…

ANDREW: if nothing else I come to this particular exercise very sympathetic to the dudes, um, and very sympathetic to how one might put themselves out there, in kind of a clownish, inept, possibly kinda sexist way in trying to get a date…

[MUSIC]

JANE: Right, and I’m like… I’m like I’ll just swipe left.

ANDREW: I’m the good cop.

JANE: And I’m the bad cop.

So, we’re taking over someone’s Tinder account.

ANDREW: Good god.

We have two women — both 25, both dating in New York City, one, a serial first dater, and the other, more of a long term relationship kind of gal.

One is new to the city – a transplant from Nashville, and the other has been in New York for her entire dating life.  These two women will hand us their phones, we’ll swipe for them in the studio, we’ll set up the dates — and then we’ll send them out into the real world…and make it that much awkward by following them around with microphones…you know, regular date stuff.

[MUSIC OUT]

JANE: Our first victim is Jenna…she’s the voice you heard at the beginning of the show…the one you heard scream about getting a match… Yep. That’s Jenna. She’s a full-time journalist and part-time grad student, she’s a native Long Islander who commutes to the city everyday.  

JANE: And are you single?

JENNA: Uh…yes I am, very single.

JANE: How long have you been single?

JENNA: Um…alright, I’ll say I’ve been single for two and a half years. I’ve dated people for like months, weeks at a time, within that two years. But, I have not had a quote unquote serious relationship for two and a half years.

JANE: So, we took a look at her profile pictures, and we were impressed.   

JANE: First of all you are beautiful…Nice butt!

ANDREW: Yeah, agree.

JENNA: Oh my! Thank you so much.

JANE: Yeah. You have it going on.

ANDREW: Yeah… this is, this is going to be this is going to be so easy.

JENNA: Thank you. I feel like I need to hang out with you guys every day just for the ego boost.

JANE: This is one of the funny things about Jenna. She thinks she’s really awkward and she seems kind of surprised when we tell her how cute she is. But, she’s a HOT DATE! And, even though Tinder Takeover is the time for us to decide what’s best for her, we played nice and asked her about the type of men that she’s interested in.

JENNA: I think now that you’re asking me like, could I go on a tangent and give you a long laundry list of things that I’m interested in? Of course. I think any human being could.

JANE: Go!

JENNA: I am a big fan of banter. Um, I’m very sarcastic. I make a lot of pop culture references.

I want someone that’s like family oriented…. like someone that’s like not too religious I mean someone who is like my height or taller. I feel like I used to be one of those people who is like only tall men. But like, I am five foot 10.

JENNA: I mean…I’m a lot to handle.

JENNA: I’m not…I think anyone who’s met me knows that… I’m extremely extroverted, I can talk to a chair if I need to….Uh, in a non-psychotic kind of way. I want someone that has something new to bring to the table.

JANE: What do you want them to look like?

JENNA: John Krasinski

JANE: John Krasinski?

JENNA: that’s like my dream man in more ways than I could tell you… everyone’s laughing in the studio right now…

ANDREW: That should be pretty attainable, come on.

JANE:  That is so easy, we will get you John Krasinski in five minutes…oh my god…like a doofy white guy?

JENNA: I, I’m thinking about it too am I going through all my like celebrity crushes right now. And I feel like you hate all of them. You know who one of my biggest celebrity crushes is?

ANDREW: Let’s go.

JENNA: The Rock.

ANDREW AND JANE: Whaaaat? Nice.

JENNA: I think he’s super hot…

JANE: This I am about OK.

JENNA: I’m also really into Jason Momoa. Yeah. I am all about this beards, I’m really big into beards, by the way…

JANE: This is so helpful

ANDREW: Beards, ok.

JANE:  This is really helpful though

ANDREW: So you’re saying you’re saying like someone who’s on a NBC sitcom but in like two months could get so ripped It’s scary.

ANDREW: Cuz..that…that is what I’m hearing

JENNA: You guys got this.

JANE: So, for Jenna…our mission was to find a guy who looks like a NBC sitcom star or a pro wrestler…IDEALLY: A combination of both… and who also knows how to tell jokes and hold an intelligent conversation.  

So, now, the good part: Judging people with no repercussions.

[MUSIC IN]

JANE: That’s a John Krasinski right there, baby!

ANDREW: Yeah!

JANE: That’s a John Krasinski right there…He’s 6 foot four. If it matters… girl! Romantic chivalrous respectful looking for company relationship and friendship.

JENNA: Yeah, you can say yeah to him

JANE: No…no…no…

JANE: Why is he wearing that belt buckle in every photo?

ANDREW: Because he’s a fucking dapper man.

JENNA: No this man is really hot…  

JANE: Fine, whatever…

JANE: No

 

ANDREW: Oh, we got a party boy…

JANE: He’s a douche bag…he’s a douche bag

ANDREW: I’m going to say his real job is fake DJ

JENNA: He looks like he’d be mean to me in a bar.

JANE: Ok, here we go…Michael. I’m saying yes, I’m saying yes. Saying yes already.

ANDREW: He’s got that Krasinski chin

JANE: He’s got that Krasinski Face!

[Tinder Match SFX]

ANDREW: YES

JENNA: I just got a match

ANDREW: Fuck yeah

JANE: Oh…OH… he uses my most hated words in all of Tinder. You guys want to guess what it is?

JENNA: Moist?

JANE: Sapiosexual.

JENNA: Ughhhhh

ANDREW: Yeah. Just fuck a brain in a jar. Jesus. Fuck a USB port.

JANE: Guys, I don’t understand this um.. This bio.

 

ANDREW: Alright, let me hear it

 

JANE: It says, “looking for my Allie, it’s been 156 days.”

 

JENNA: He’s talking about The Notebook. He’s inferring that he’s Noah..Yeah, swipe right! He’s super cute!

 

 

JENNA: Oh, whoa. We got a message! We got a message back.

JENNA: OK. Do you want to message him, or should I?

JANE: You Should

JENNA: Just ask him on a date?

JANE: Yeah let’s move  to the date!

ANDREW: Nice. This is fucking fascinating for me. I love being here.

[MUSIC OUT]

JANE: So Andrew and I matched Jenna with a bunch of hot guys, seemingly-intelligent hot guys. And then we sent her out on dates…

JENNA: Okay, so, I’m currently walking towards the bar that I’m meeting this man at. We work in similar industries, so that seems promising. Um, I’m vaguely nervous. But not nervous enough where I’m going to vomit. It’s kind of like Sunday night, before work jitters. He seems cute. I hope he looks like his photos…. And yeah, here we go.

 

JANE: And things quickly… evolved? Got interesting? What’s a polite way to say, “went off the rails?” Jenna recorded her date for us on her phone…

 

JENNA: Okay so, I’m in a bar right now and the guy I’m on a date with just went to the bathroom, and I’ve made friends with the three men at the bar around me. One is Australian. Can you just say “hi?”

AUSSIE SAM: Hi

JENNA: Keith, the bartender from the bar I usually frequent..

KEITH: Hola

JENNA: And I don’t know your name…

ALEX: Alex, nice to meet you.

JENNA: And this is Shane..

SHANE: How’s it going?

JENNA: This is the most insane first date that I’ve ever been on.

AUSSIE: Under the table. Quick. Quick. Quick.

JENNA: You’re giving me your email address? And what’s your first name?

SAM: Sam.

JENNA: Sam, hi, I’m Jenna

SAM: You told me

JENNA: Thank you, Sam. I will read it. Thank you.

 

JANE: Ok, so let me interpret. You just heard an Australian gentleman named Sam trying to pick Jenna up while her date was in the bathroom. Jenna is going to explain what exactly happened there when we get her back in the studio…but first date number two, a couple nights later, at the very same bar…But this time, we got her a total Krasinski.

 

BRYAN: I’m Bryan, I’m 29 and I’m a filmmaker who lives in
Brooklyn.

 

JANE: Before Jenna met up with Bryan, our producer Katelyn checked in with her…

 

KATELYN: How did you get ready for the date?

JENNA: I literally took an hour and a half nap in my offices nap room.

And that was about it. I’m kind of dressed like a little boy right now. I have on like converse, leggings, and an oversized ripped shirt. So…

KATELYN: Do you think it’s going to go well?

JENNA: I mean I hope so.

 

JANE: Five minutes later, Bryan showed up…

 

JENNA: I know this is super weird. Thanks for being down with it.

BRYAN: No, not at all…

JENNA: nice to meet you.

BRYAN: It’s definitely awkward….

 

JANE: According to our lurking producer, Katelyn – it started out great! Jenna was drinking a little pink cocktail and Bryan had a beer. Right off the bat they were chatting, cracking jokes. But if we’ve learned anything about dating Jenna: it is never go to the bathroom…

 

[MUSIC]

 

KATELYN: Can you brief me on what just happened?

JENNA: this is so mortifying. I feel like these things only happen to me. So Bryan just went to the bathroom. We had literally just gotten our brand new fucking drinks.

KATELYN: Wait…how many drinks?

JENNA: We had three drinks.  We’re in this corner of the a bar with a ledge next to us, so that’s where the drinks were. And I’ve had my elbow on it, like i’ve had my elbow on it all night and I adjusted myself to take out my phone to pretend to check it, because that’s what you do when someone goes to the bathroom and the entire ledge fell over and flipped out of the wall on top of me and now my entire leg smells like vodka and/or Lagunitas because that’s what he ordered, and my jacket is covered and yeah. [LAUGHS]

 

JENNA: I’m the most awkward human being to walk the face of the earth, is the jist of that [laughs].

KATELYN: Was he a good sport about it?

JENNA: yeah he was like fine because if anyone else came back and saw it they’d be like omg but you saw it so it’s helpful to have a third party to be like she didn’t rip this out of the wall like a psychopath. Which is honestly what I would have thought if i had been the one who went to the bathroom and i came back and my date was covered in broken glass.

 

KATELYN: How is the date going?

JENNA: OK, valid question..Bryan is really nice. Totally someone I’d hang out with, with friends. Just not feeling it romantically.

 

[MUSIC OUT]

 

JANE: Poor Jenna…remodeling the bar is comedy gold…but, we wanted her to date a sitcom star..not become one. But, how did Bryan feel about his vodka-covered date?

 

BRYAN: I’m feeling good. I had a great conversation with her…I had a really good time. For sure.

KATELYN: Uh…so, how do you see the night ending?

BRYAN: I don’t know i guess we’ll see where we go. I have no idea…I don’t know what’s gonna happen at the end of the night..

 

JANE: So, Bryan liked her…enough to COMPLETELY disregard the broken bar and shattered glass debacle…Jenna and Bryan spent another TWO hours together at that bar. That makes their total date running time FIVE hours. FIVE!

So, a few days later Jenna came back into the studio to debrief us. We talked about both dates — starting with that surprise group situation.

 

JANE: Can you tell me about the first date you went on?

JENNA: So that date kind of got insane because it became a group date. Um…

JANE: How…what?

JENNA: We were sitting at the corner…We’re at the corner of the bar, and I have the guy at the end. He and I were talking for like maybe 10 minutes and we were literally talking about lunch. We were just talking about the most generic — you know when someone shows up and you’re just like “no…this isn’t going to be a thing”

JANE: Mmhmm

JENNA: But, we started talking and he’s very nice….and in walks the bartender from the bar where I go to with my co-workers every week — like multiple times a week. This man knows me…he knows my family life. He’s my Sam from Cheers.

JANE and ANDREW: [laughs]

JENNA: So then, the three of us start talking and then like there’s another rando…he was eating a hamburger… he got involved in the conversation, and then the guy on my right, there was an Australian tourist who like interjected to ask us a bar recommendation and then he got in the conversation. And then my date got up to go to the bathroom and the Australian tourist slipped me a note and gave me his email, while on the date with the other guy.

 

JANE: You know what though, I think that if you’re clearly on your first blind date then you’re clearly single.

JENNA: Right.

JANE: And all of the men in the room can like you smell it.

JENNA: No it was totally fine

JANE: And they’re like…he’s had five minutes with her, but, I can see I can swoop in right now…

ANDREW: Right

JENNA: It ended very amicably, like we walked to the subway together, I gave him a hug… but, you know, no romantic prospect whatsoever.

 

JANE: Date number one: Meh. Date number two?

 

JENNA: So, the second guy’s name was Bryan. He was, super super nice. I know that’s a super generic way of describing someone, but…

JANE: I was like…this doesn’t sound good at all…

JENNA: We actually had like really really great conversation. I was literally on that date for like five and a half hours and it was just…

ANDREW: Woah…What did you do for five and a half hours?

JENNA: We were like literally just talking like it was good like… It was like a really nice like intellectual discourse which was like pleasant. You don’t usually get that on Friday night in a bar.

JANE: Mmhmm

JENNA: There was like a moment at the end of the night… I think we each had like six drinks and we were saying goodbye that like maybe you like we could have kissed and like it wouldn’t have been weird, but it didn’t happen and it was fine that it didn’t happen.

 

JANE: Jenna was obviously into Brian enough to spend FIVE hours with him…but, I could tell there was something holding her back…

 

JENNA: I tend to like wait for the other person to like give me the cue as to whether they like me or not, and then I decide, which is a terrible…terrible way to exist…and I’m fully cognizant of that.  I feel like, perhaps if I knew like right off the bat that he was into me like maybe it would change how I feel now… I don’t know.

JANE: Wait…has something bad happened to you in the past when you’ve crushed on someone?

JENNA: Yea… I’m like thinking about it now…I think there’s really only been one situation with guys that like…it was a mutual… where like we both were like walked away from it because we both were feeling like it was it was time. Every other situation I’ve had, it’s the guy that walks away.

 

And I think it’s yeah, it’s probably like a deep seated it’s rejection issue, I guess? I don’t know.  I have absolutely no problem like being myself like it’s not that. It’s just the emotional wall.

 

JANE: I’m going to throw something out there that I’ve noticed through a lot of these interviews with this podcast which is that we’re all lonely, right?

JENNA: Yeah.

ANDREW: Yes.

JANE: Yeah, we’re all lonely we all want someone to snuggle up to at night and we need intimacy and we need human connection and we need romance and all of that stuff, but actual relationships are so hard…

JENNA: They’re really, really hard

 

JANE: There’s so many elements that have to come together. And if only we could just be happy with getting one piece at a time from different friends or people or dates or whatever, like…you had this wonderful discourse with this guy. You know, you guys could do that once a month.

ANDREW: Mmhmm

JENNA: Right.

JANE: You know what I mean to expect it all to be wrapped up into one person I feel like is so….such a tall order.

 

[MUSIC]

 

JANE: Jenna has been in long term relationships. And, so, of course she’s been hurt before. And like so many of us do, without meaning to, she’s bringing those boyfriends who hurt her along on her first dates…and that’s not a good thing or a bad thing…it’s just where she is right now.

 

She’s not willing to make herself vulnerable…for just anyone.

 

JENNA: Well, I’m sorry that I failed you and didn’t find love…um…but I promise to keep trying on behalf of all of you. I will feel like I have tiny Andrew and tiny Jane on each shoulder, when I go on dates…in a non-weird way.

 

[LAUGHS]

 

Thank you guys so much, for this insane experiment…

 

JANE: Coming up after the break, our second Tinder Takeover victim meets her dungeon master…

 

[BREAK]

 

Hey DTR listeners – if you’re listening right now it means you probably like us, unless you’re hate listening, which whatever. I get it.

 

If you like the show, please rate us and leave a review on iTunes – it actually weirdly really helps. It helps other people discover the show and we’d very much appreciate it. Ok! THANKS! Back to the show…

 

JANE: Welcome back to our TINDER TAKEOVER, where volunteers give us their phones… and we make the matches. My friend Andrew Ti is in studio with me. Let’s meet our next victim.

 

JANE: So, Victoria.

 

VICTORIA: Hello!

 

JANE: This is new to New York VICTORIA. Straight from Nashville…Andrew and I brought her into the studio to get to know her taste in dudes.

 

JANE: Can we get some like real basic background info on you?

 

VICTORIA: Absolutely.

 

JANE: Well, how long have you been on Tinder?

 

VICTORIA: Off and on for like a year or so.

 

JANE: How long have you been single?

 

VICTORIA: I’ve like been on dates but haven’t really ever been in like a super long-term relationship. Um, there’s been like some people who I’ve kinda dated for a while, but I’m kind of like lifelong single, is what I would classify myself as.

 

JANE: And what are you looking for?

 

VICTORIA: Um, I just moved to New York like six months ago, so also just like meeting new people, um, here, is always something. Um, and I think like, eventually I would like to be in a more long-term serious relationship, but it just kinda hasn’t happened yet.

 

JANE: So, physically, what are you looking for?

 

VICTORIA: Um, so I am 6’2”. And so ideally, guys who are taller than me are like awesome, but also very hard to find. So height is something that I like definitely notice. I think I go for like, the slightly like, nerdy hipster type.

 

JANE: Okay, who’s your celebrity crush?

 

VICTORIA: ooo. Probably like, this is so obvious, but like, Ryan Gosling is such a celebrity crush.

 

JANE: He’s so tiny!

 

ANDREW: He’s a wee man. Um…

 

ANDREW: Like, Ryan Gosling’s face on Larry Bird’s body.

 

VICTORIA: There we go. That would be great. Um…

 

ANDREW: Okay.

 

JANE: Larry Bird’s former body. Not his current — (laughs)

 

ANDREW: Oh, I don’t know…

 

JANE: We gotta find you a baby-faced, very tall, a tall, tall, tall baby.

 

ANDREW: A baby faced giant.

 

JANE: Yeah.

 

JANE: So to find that baby-faced giant man, we logged into Victoria’s Tinder account and got to swiping!  We also booked TWO dates in ONE night. They weren’t guys that we would have swiped right on…but we decided that maybe with Victoria we’d actually let her have a say! And she made some FASCINATING choices…which we had to make fun of in the studio, it’s a rite of passage…

VICTORIA: So, Jason and Joseph are the ones that I’m going out with.

JANE: Okay. So let’s go to Jason. He is only 6 foot tall, but that’s not short.

 

ANDREW: And he looks exactly like Bear Grylls.

 

VICTORIA: I do kinda love Bear Grylls.

 

JANE: Uh…. I think he looks a little — I’m gonna just say it.

 

ANDREW: Mm hm.

 

JANE: A little like Euro…

 

ANDREW: Oh yeah. He looks like he’s definitely gonna score some like,

Serbian molly at

 

JANE: Ibiza, yeah. He goes to Ibiza. That fourth picture is him in Ibiza splashing someone with a camera.

 

VICTORIA: It’s like a Go-Pro. It’s adventurous.

 

JANE: Oh, okay. Go-Pro, bleh. Oh my God, if I dated a guy and he was like, “I have a Go-Pro…”

 

ANDREW: OUT

 

JANE: You better Go-Bro!

 

ANDREW: NICE!

 

JANE: And then the next match:

 

JANE: Okay. Let’s look at Joseph. Joseph. Baby-faced.

 

ANDREW: Joseph. Thirsty, thirsty-ass, super-liking Joseph.

 

JANE: Oh… He did the super like.

 

JANE: Here, he’s eating and walking at the same time. Um, that is fine. He can multitask. Uh, that —

 

ANDREW: He’s — he’s got another — he’s got a friend of equal or greater height, so — so keep that in mind.

 

JANE: Yeah, he has friends who are the same height as him.    

 

ANDREW: there are bigger red flags.

 

JANE: Oh, there’s a bigger red flag. Yeah, right here. Right in the beginning.

 

ANDREW: Yep.

 

ANDREW: It says, “DM” — that’s dungeonmaster, uh — “DM for two D and D groups” — that’s Dungeons and Dragons groups —

 

JANE: It’ll be fine. Just don’t be — don’t be surprised if he’s like, got some weird sex thing.

 

ANDREW: There’s more. He actually has — you know what, it’s like he’s talking to you, Jane, cause next up, “If you can’t handle me at my DND, you don’t deserve me at my DTF.”

 

JANE: (laughs)

 

ANDREW: You got burned. You got burned by this psychic.

 

JANE: For me, this is 100 percent NO GO. But, as a digital yenta, my job isn’t to judge – it is to tailor my services to the needs of my client.

 

VICTORIA: See, I like nerds.

 

JANE: No…

 

ANDREW: FACT: — Jane, you’ve never once dated someone who didn’t at least one time put someone in a locker. [LAUGHS] They’re not maybe proud of it today, but they did it.

 

JANE: Let me update that. I’ve never — right. I’ve — well. Okay. Look, I have to tweak that a little bit, which is — I thought you were just gonna say, “who hasn’t been in a fistfight and won.”

 

ANDREW: Correct, correct. Yeah.

 

JANE: Right.

 

JANE: Enough about me let’s get on with the date…first up Jason, that Go-Bro Ibiza guy, who looks like Bear Grylls. Victoria and Jason were set to meet at a bar in Brooklyn, and our producer Katelyn made Jason talk to her before the date…he did NOT like being recorded…

 

JASON: This is terrifying. This is terrible. This is the worst. This is not a date.

KATELYN: It is.

JASON: It’s an interview for a date…In a way. I don’t know what this is.

JANE: And then we finally let Jason meet Victoria.

VICTORIA: You didn’t bring your producer?

JASON: I didn’t…you’ll have to talk to us. Let’s get you a drink…

JANE: Round one of drinks seemed pretty promising. So, after he and Victoria ordered their second round…Katelyn checked in with them…

VICTORIA: I had not high expectations, but he’s turned out to be a relatively wholesome person.

KATELYN: So, how do you think this night is going to end?

VICTORIA: I have no idea. I feel like we could potentially meet up again.

 

JANE: They were having a good time!  There was definitely arm touching! But Jason cut the night short…he had plans…with his “friend” Tyrone. Tyrone, if you’re listening to this…are you real? We need to know! Tweet at me!

So, on to date number two — bar number two — the date with Dungeon Master Joseph…Katelyn talked with both of them pre-date. First, Victoria…

KATELYN: Alright, we are in Williamsburg at a swanky little cocktail lounge.

VICTORIA: It’s a classy little spot, with some dark wood tones, little candle light. Feeling good.

KATELYN: And it is snowing.

VICTORIA: quite a bit.

 

JANE: And then, she talked to the Dungeon Master himself, Joseph…

 

KATELYN: Are you excited for this date? Are you nervous? How are you feeling?

JOSEPH: I’m feeling good. Pretty excited. I mean it’s kind of weird. Cause you know, of course there’s going to be an element where we need to be interviewed but, whatever…  

JANE: And then, one drink in..

 

VICTORIA: Why, hello

KATELYN: how’s it going?

VICTORIA: It’s going well. I feel like it’s been solid conversation. Good eye contact so yeah. Well so far! I would definitely be open to at least another date.

KATELYN: Do you think you’re going to kiss?

VICTORIA: Probably not. But who knows.

KATELYN: I’m not going to look…

VICTORIA: Thank you.

 

JANE: So we are going to tell you how that date ended in one minute… we brought Victoria into the studio to talk about both dates and we started with date number one: Go Bro Jason…

 

ANDREW: Was he sort of a jerk, as we sort of predicted?

VICTORIA: He did not come off as a jerk to me….

ANDREW: Nice…

JANE: Yeah yeah that’s nice. But the date ended with his “friend” Tyrone. I’d rather talk about date number two, cuz I really wanna know how THAT ended…

KATELYN: Wait, this is Katelyn. I actually have tape from the end of the date…it’s Victoria and I in the cab. Can I play it?

JANE: Um, yes please…please play that tape

KATELYN: All right. We are in an uber now.  I didn’t see how you guys said goodbye what happened?

VICTORIA: I went in for a hug and we hugged and there might have been a kiss afterwards.

KATELYN: Whaaaaat….

KATELYN: If there was a kiss, hypothetically. Was it on the lips?

VICTORIA: It was. If it hypothetically existed.

 

[MUSIC]  

JANE IN STUDIO: GOOD KISSER?

VICTORIA: YEAH…IT WAS SOLID. That was forward but i kinda dig it.

JANE: And hey, here’s an update from the future — Victoria and Dungeon Master Joseph have been texting! And they have another date set up! I call it a success. We even got Victoria a kiss, and it was easy.

But we know it’s not ALWAYS easy. You can see that, on paper, these women are pretty much the same: 25-year-old single ladies in a giant city full of eligible dudes. But, in reality, they’re at really different points in their dating lives.  

Victoria, she’s new in town, and the stakes are low for her. She doesn’t really know how bad a broken heart can be. She’s open to everything, she wants to meet new people and have new experiences.

Jenna, on the other hand, is more in a place to know what she wants. She doesn’t have to be open to everything because she’s got experience to guide her. And that’s ok.

Both of our clients told us that they had fun. And now at least they’ve got a weird story to tell on future dates.  

And I actually learned a lesson too. In the course of my digital yentaing –  I looked up the word “yenta” — and discovered that an alternate definition is “busybody.”

But you know what? I have a boyfriend now, so what else am I going to do? Watch out single friends! I might take over your Tinder next…

CREDITS

 

JANE: That’s it for this week’s episode of DTR.

 

And actually, this is our final episode of DTR this season. Thank you all for listening, for sharing your feedback and leaving us iTunes reviews. We have loved sharing these amazing stories with you, so stay in touch! I’m on Twitter @seejanemarie and you can follow Gimlet Creative @gimletcreative and Tinder at @tinder.

 

And if YOU have a Tinder story you’d like to share, send us an email to DTR@Gimletmedia.com

 

DTR is a branded podcast from Tinder, made in partnership with Gimlet Creative.

 

This episode was produced by me, Jane Marie, along with Katelyn Bogucki, Nicole Wong, Frances Harlow, Abbie Ruzicka and Grant Irving, with Creative Direction from Nazanin Rafsanjani. This episode was mixed and engineered by Zac Schmidt and Dann Gallucci.

 

Thanks to RMW and Christine Driscoll. Special thanks to my friend Andrew Ti for his sage wisdom — everyone go subscribe to his podcast “Yo, Is This Racist” RIGHT NOW. And of course, an extra special thanks to you, Jenna and Victoria for entrusting us with your Tinder accounts.

 

To learn more about DTR, visit DTRshow.com. DTR is on iTunes, Google Play, and wherever you listen to podcasts.

 

I’m Jane Marie. Thanks for listening.

 

CODA

 

JENNA: Wait guys he’s really cute.

JANE: No, he’s not.

JANE: What do you want me to say to peter? Like, Peter you look like a delicious potato?

JENNA: I’d like to fry you up and dip you in aioli.

ANDREW: Did it hurt when they scooped all those eyes off you to make you just a person? Cuz you look like a potato.

JENNA: Oh my god I hated that.

ANDREW: that’s a good opening line, right? I’m pretty sure that will be good